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Episode 239: Don’t Put the Cart Before the Horse




Welcome to another episode of the Bleesed and Bossed Up podcast. On today's episode, I want to revisit last week for a second. Last week was a very unorthodox episode. If you have not heard it, please go back and listen to last week's episode is called don't over-complicate commit. And that episode, God really just disrupted everything that I had going on. I wasn't even working on the podcast at the time, but he really just pulled me out of what I was doing so that I can facilitate the prayer call that happened last week.


And I do want to address one thing. So someone sent a message to us on Instagram about how we had ads in last week's episode. And it's something that I thought about prior to putting an episode out that I hated that I had to interrupt the prayer to put the ads in, but I'm contractually obligated to do ads in their books way before the podcast comes out. I have ads that have been purchased for the rest of the year for the podcast.


And I record in real time. So I don't record six, seven episodes at a time to where I'm that far ahead. I record them in real time. And so I have ads purchased for shows that I've not recorded yet. And so one thing that I wanted to do though, and we sent this to our, the person who brought it up to us, but I wanted to also offer this. I sent it to the society members as well, but I wanted to offer this to you guys. If you want a copy of last week's prayer uninterrupted with no ads, I'm going to put a link in the show notes where you can just, it's one of those automated things.


We can just put your information in and we'll email over to you. Add free copy of that prayer. I want you guys to have it at free and the way the podcast industry is now, like usually you have to pay a premium. So even if, look at apple quick little podcasts industry insider, when it, if you look at apple right now, they have like a fee-based model. So similar to how like Patrion and paywall type of apps go to where you pay a subscription in order to get access to premium and ad free content.


That's pretty much what apple is doing now, but I'm not really interested in doing that for the podcast. I don't want to charge for this show. This is the platform that I come and I pour out for free. I charge the corporations. I don't charge y'all to hear the content. So I want to offer that to you though. So just put your information in, it'll email it over to you because I want you to continue to go back and reference that prayer. Whenever you feel like you are able to see God for yourself, whenever you feel like you need somebody to pray for you.


We covered that. So download it, put it in your phone, put it in your computer, whatever, so that you can go back and consistently reference. Hey guys, I want to take a second to talk to you about hover. One of our sponsors. I know you all love learning about tech and hover is a great tech company to talk about. Hubbard is a jumping off point for a ton of entrepreneurs, and they want you to start your business with a domain name. Hover has over 300 domain name extensions to choose from when building your brand online, no matter what you want to build, there's a domain name waiting for it.


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We got after a week and I've been doing this show for four and a half years. So you may be listening to Tatum in 2021, but you may not understand that I was that same commitment phobe when it came to Christ back in 2017. And, and before that, but before I get into that, though, I want to remind you guys that my devotional business meetings with God is available for pre-order right now. So it's a pre-order item. You guys are going ship out this month. Soon as they get to me, I'm sending them to y'all, I'm not hoarding these devotionals.


They get an a right back out this house, but that's available@blessedinboston.com slash devotional. We have a number that you can text and I'll put in the show notes to where if you send us blessed to that number, you'll get a 20% off discount code for the devotional. And we're also having a challenge. So it's a 90 day devotional, and we're going to be hosting a 10 day challenge within the society, which in this period will be free to S this challenge period will be free, of course, but we're hosting this accountability challenge where I want to hold you accountable to seeking God on behalf of your business.


All of those details are available@blessboston.com slash devotional. I only have about 25 or so left as I'm recording this. And so those are all the pre-orders hundreds of people have purchased these pre-orders for this devotion. When I'm down to my last 25, after those 25 are done, we're going to order more, but it's definitely not going to be to you by the challenge time. So definitely get that a devotional claimed ASAP. If you want to get your friends involved, go ahead and buy a form, tell them cash app you or whatever, but I want you guys to get it in time for this challenge.


And I'm down to my last 25. All right, now that we got the church announcements out the way I want to revisit my testimony, because like I said, I don't want you guys to look at me in 2021 and forget where I was at. Even when I first started this podcast back in, I think we launched in 2017, but I started working on it in 2016. I started working on the show, maybe like summer 2016, and then we launched January, 2017.


But that same commitment that God was talking about. And a lot of you guys, you asked me a lot about, you know, hearing from God and building that relationship with God. And I feel like we get to the point, even when it comes to seeking him on behalf of your business, we're trying to put the cart before the horse, in a sense to where before you can make God to see yo, you got to know who God is as your father. You gotta know Jesus as your savior. You gotta know that the character of God, you got to know his personality.


You gotta be able to accept his love. And this is a space that I feel like we oftentimes try to skip over, but it's so necessary because if you truly connected with understood, internalize the magnitude of how God, how much God loves you, it will really make that commitment a lot easier. Think about this. Y'all Jesus died on the cross for our sins.


Thousands of years ago that we commit today, sins that were committed right now. Why are we out in the streets? Because quote unquote outside, open it back up saying that we commit right now, we're prepaid before. Like, if you just think, and just sit in the lunch of that for a second, how could, who wouldn't serve a God like that? If you look back at your life and think about all the things that should have taken you out that day, when you weren't even right, recognizing or acknowledging God, he still preserved you and saved you.


Like if you just really think, I believe that that commitment will be a lot easier. Being really present is something that I believe we miss now because we get everything so instantaneously and on demand in a way the technology is we don't have to really like we're so far ahead that we don't know how to just be right here. And I believe that a part of this faith journey, what would really be beneficial for you, for me, for all of us, is that we take time to truly be present and God's miracles be present.


And what he's doing right now be present and what he's brought us through and reminisce and reflect on those things space. I sat in the bonus episode. Faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God. So if we're able to really just sit and read our Bibles and read these stories of faith, that will really fan the flames of the faith, that we need to continue to see this thing through and to truly commit. But I wanted to just take you guys on my journey for a second. Cause you may be new here.


You may be, you may have been listening for a while and can benefit from just a refresher. You know, the Bible says we are saved by the blood of the lamb and the word of our testimony. So I want to share with you guys a bit of my testimony in an effort to inspire you and help you with your commitment, especially because it's definitely been a while since I talked about my personal journey and my commitment to God. So as I've said before, I didn't grow up in church. I went to church relatively often throughout the years, but I didn't, I wasn't one of those people who grew up in church, I didn't know what it looked like to truly live a life for Christ.


I hadn't seen it. You know, I've seen more so of the lukewarm one foot in one foot out, we going to go to the club on Saturday, we're going to wake up and go to church on Sunday. Then X is going to still be on our hands, but we won't be in the building. Like that is the type of environment that I was around. And I'm sure that a lot of you guys are around as well. I didn't really experience being around people who truly live righteously through and through. Okay. Never seen it, but I got saved around maybe 17 or so late too.


Maybe like a junior or senior in high school. And I went to something at a church and I felt that I needed to answer the call to be safe. They asked like, are you sure if your name is written in a landfill Lamb's book of life? I did not. No. So I went down there and so even at a young age, I knew that God was pulling on me. I didn't have the language to articulate that I didn't have the resources to do anything with that feeling. And so I just went back to doing what I knew how to do, which was whatever I wanted and being Luke more, man, just confessing with my mouth and believed in my heart that Jesus Christ died on the cross for my sins, but not really living a life that's pleasing to him while I'm here.


And definitely not seeking him on behalf of what his plan is for me. Like I ain't never heard that one before. So I was definitely nowhere near that. And so that was my foundation. Not really knowing how to commit because I hadn't seen it before. And this was before social media is what it is now. So I couldn't even have like virtual mentors or anybody that I could glean from or look up to as far as what life or living life for God looks like.


And because I didn't have that, I went back to what I knew, which was not committee and my false perception of what committed and looked like was this Christian handbook that I had been taught, which was don't smoke. Don't drink, don't have sex. Don't cuss go to church on Sundays. Like it was this rigid way of life. That to me felt more like bondage than it did like freedom.


And because I was always the type of person where I wanted freedom, I didn't want to live like that, that it felt too hard. And it felt disingenuine. And looking back the issue, the issue wasn't the standard because we are to live a certain type of, but wait, God called us to be set apart, not to blend in with our surroundings and doing what the world is doing. We're supposed to be salt and light. So what was really the problem was I was taught religion and not relationship.


And in order for me to truly get into right standing with God, in order for me to truly experience freedom, because this commitment to Christ breeds freedom, but religion will make it feel like bondage and man-made systems and rules and things that you don't even find in the Bible makes it feel like bonded. But relationship is what makes you feel free. And I wasn't taught that growing up and looking back. I believe that that mindset shift is something that that's going to be beneficial for you guys, as you're on his journey of truly, truly committing to Christ is breaking free from religion and walking into relationship.


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Let's get right back to the show.


Speaker 2 (17m 16s): And so for any of you guys who may be struggling, that's one piece of advice from my story that I would give you. And so fast forward to when I got saved to say, this is a period of time in my life that I really gave my life to Christ in a sense where I committed that I was going to live for him now, not to say that I was perfect right after that, because that is a bold face lie. I'm still not perfect right now, but I had a heart posture while I desired to please God. And I desire to be in relationship with him and to truly live out who he created me to be.


And the difference between this recommitment and before was I took control over building a relationship with God for myself. Now, before I was a teenager, I was young. I was still at my parents' house. Hadn't been out yet. And then when I got saved and saved, I was grown. I was living on my own. I was, I had already started a business at this point. So I was in entrepreneurship. I was working, I was at home all adults and I was responsible now for what my life was going to look like.


And if I, I was going to live a life that was acceptable to God or not. And I have made the decision and I made a covenant with God in my closet. I said, God, if you light a fire on the inside of me for you, I will not stop back. And that has been the commitment that I made that day, that I continue to reinforce my decision since. So when you talk about being committed, it's not about how perfect you can be. It's not about how you, well, you wear this mask of Christianity. It's about the decisions that you make to obey God on a day-to-day basis.


Now we can't talk about obeying God, Hmm, doing what he says. If we haven't covered the foundation of understanding his word, and I started off that way, just we have to, we can't put the cart before the horse relationship comes by getting to know somebody. When you meet a person and you guys are developing a relationship, be a friendship, romantic, a work relationship, whatever the context may be. You get to know that person in a way that we get to know God as we go back to his word. And so for me, I knew that I needed to get to know God.


And so I decided to open my Bible. I got to the point where with the Bible that I had, where I didn't understand it, it was written in like maybe the new king James translation. So it wasn't as thou thee and all of that, but it was still, I still wasn't. It wasn't clicking for me to fully comprehend. And so with that, I started to buy books. Joyce Meyer is somebody that I absolutely love. And a lot of her books are the foundation of my relationship with God, because they helped me to understand. And I started buying.


So I started buying her books. I bought a new Bible. It was a study Bible that somebody had actually recommended to me. And that's the one that I always recommend to you. Y'all and I bought a journal. It was one of them, $5 journals from TJ Maxx that was just had like some flowers on the front or whatever, maybe a little quote. And it was blank. And use that journal to write out my feelings, write down scriptures that resonated with me when I started, when I was in church. If the pastor would say something that would just hit different, like y'all know when somebody say something, yeah.


Was a hit like, dang, like that was, that was for me. So if you ever heard, say that is for me when you're listening to something and it's a scripture me and say, write it down. And even if I couldn't even this, the, where the scripture was. So even if I didn't know it was James two and four, I will write down the words and I will go to Google and type in scripture. And the words and the scripture will then pop up. I will find it and I will begin to read it. So not just reading that particular text, but I will use my study Bible to figure out the context of the whole book or the chapter.


What are the things, how does this relate to today? I even then discovered that there were Bible studies online. So I would go to Amazon and find different Bible studies of texts that may have been resonating with me, that I wanted a deeper understanding of lifeway.com is another place that I would go. I knew of Lifeway as being like the Christian store in the mall, but I didn't know they had this online marketplace where you can get Bible studies and things of that nature. And we still use a lot of those today, even with like the society will get like the group licenses so that we can post them in our group and things, but I would go and get these Bible studies so that I can understand now at this time I wasn't entrepreneur, but I wasn't seeking God on behalf of my business yet.


I was just seeking God to build a relationship with him because I committed to doing that. And I would set aside time to pray and I would write down my prayers. There was one time I wrote down a list of things that I was believing in God for. And I did this often. This is why I have tools like the, what God's track record spreadsheet that I offered on some, one of these videos and podcasts. We crave so much content. I can't even remember it's somewhere. If you want to know where it is like DMS on Instagram and the team will make sure you get it.


So I started writing down different prayer requests and I would go back when they were answered. And I will write the date that the prayer was answered and just doing these things started to build my faith. It started to build my trust. It made it started making it a lot easier to truly commit and live this life because I was seeing what God was doing and not only just what he was doing for me, but just my countenance changed my, I mean, I was this, this girl at this time, I'm in my early twenties.


I was this ambitious girl, but still very broken, accomplished a lot on the surface, but still very hurt. Internally. Still had a lot of trauma that I needed to deal with. Still was angry in a lot of ways and snappy and a lot of ways and not really loving people the way that I should, because I had been hurt by people so much. And so I got cleaned me up. So I don't even want to give to so much to the point where I'm talking about what he's done, as far as the things he's given or the blessings that he's given, because he's going to do those things too.


But those things meant are small to me compared to the way that he cleaned me up, the way that I can look at myself in the mirror and love me no matter what weight I may be or what I may look like externally. I love who I am. And I am very much so proud of the woman that I am very confident in who I am. I wasn't always like this. My grandmother will tell you when I was younger. I wouldn't even look people in the face. I always look down because I didn't want, I didn't even have enough confidence to look somebody in their eyes, but now I walk into the room.


I'm not going to be the extroverted person because that's just not my temperament, but I'm going to walk into the room with my chin up my shoulders back and eggs and exude a level of confidence that only comes from the peace of God. And it only comes from God truly molding me and cleaning me up there. No way that I could even be the wife that I am without God cleaning me up first. And so I have to just stress when it comes to commitment. Again, we can't put the cart before the horse where we're trying to get these things in our business and see the success and neglect the fact that God is also a God that cares about us.


He knows every hair on our head. He made us, we are fearfully and wonderfully made. We are a Royal priesthood, a chosen generation, like God says that we are right. And so built this relationship. Not only that, I see how he came through. I also started to see how he was changing me. And so I kept this up. I kept reading the books and writing down the scriptures, going, doing the Bible studies, all of these things that are listed, keeping my journal, writing everything down.


I kept doing these things. And then I got to the point where God started speaking to me about my, my calling. And I'm really seeking him on behalf of the entrepreneurial endeavors that I was doing. And so at this time I had the podcast and God began to give me instructions. And again, we talked about committing all this stuff that I talked about before, building a relationship that was the foundation. And that built up my faith to be able to give these scary yeses to God when they didn't make sense.


Y'all see me now, y'all see this show with these, these sponsors throwing all this money on this show, and you see all these listeners and followers and this very successful company and all of these things that we're able to do, these events, all of that. But back when God started giving me instructions on what to do, none of that was even a factor. So the first instruction was do the cast by yourself. I procrastinated on that for about six months, and then I decided to do it.


The next instruction was change the name. And so during the episodes called I did, my first episode was called blessed in Boston, where I told the audience about how we were changing everything about the show. I was doing it by myself. I was going to be talking about God because he was doing some things in my life. And I was going to start being vocal about it. The episode after that was like CEO, you versus CEO, God. And that's when I first introduced the God is my CEO concept. This was back in 27, the end of 2017, going into the top of 2018.


And so I'm giving him my yes, none of this is making sense to me. None of it. I know clue with these yeses were going to amount to, but within the first week, month of God, and then using my platform or meet, committing, or surrendering this platform to him and allow him to speak through me every week, the listenership devil that was at the top of 2018. Around that time, he also told me to shut down my business. You guys know that story. It's on my YouTube. So I shut the business down.


So I started making money up before then I was getting clients. I was on my way to making money in my business. He told me to shut it down. I shut it down, pulled the plug. So now I'm making no money. This episode is brought to you by movement, tiny apartment in Southern California. Two college dropouts teamed up to create a watch company that broke all the rules with fair prices, unexpected colors, and clean original designs movement grew into one of the fastest growing watch brands shipping to over 160 countries across the globe.


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Then he tells me to do the prayer journal. That was the God is my CEO prayer journal that came out. And I think in February, it was around my birthday, I believe. Yeah. In 2018, put that out, wrote my first book, blessed in Boston up. Put that out again. Still not knowing what these yeses were going to amount to putting these products out was cool, but this wasn't a sustainable company that I wanted to build and that I was building and before. So then God tells us to go on tour, tells me to go on tour. I go or call kumbaya.


She comes with me. We have no clue. I'm rushing through some of these things because I've told you guys these enough before, but I just want to recap so that you understand commitment is not about waiting for God to prove he's worth committing to it's about committing, because he doesn't have to do anything else to prove to you that he's worthy. The price been paid them sends you committed right now that he's going to forgive you for Jesus died on the cross for them thousands of years ago, God doesn't have to do anything else for you in order for you to say yes to him.


And so I want to give you examples and hope that my testimony you're saying yes, when I didn't know what was on the other side of it. And you being able to see me today and the fruit that I've been able to bear as a result of that, I'm hoping that that will encourage you to commit to him. When I did that episode last week, that was another example of guys saying, Hey, do a prayer call on the podcast. One of my objections. So that was like, well, God, we got asked, like, how are we gonna do a prayer call on the podcast when I'm gonna have to interrupt the pocket for these ads that have already been paid for?


I did the prior call anyway, cause it's not my job to figure out anything. It's my job to just be obedient. But then now, you know, after the fact we found a creative way to still give you the episode uninterrupted, without breaking any of our obligations, as far as advertising partnerships goals. But in a moment I had to just say, yeah, and I've gotten so many DM emails of people giving. There are testimonies. Shout out to all of you guys who send me emails.


I read all of them. I don't always respond, but I read all of the testimony, emails, because that feels me, that fans, the flame of mine, faith, just cause I'm honestly, y'all, I'm talking to myself like I'm recording this right now. I'm in my son's playroom. It's Saturday at 8:16 PM. I'm going to record this, schedule it to go out at midnight a Sunday morning, but I'm talking to myself. So to be able to just see the fruit of obedience and it's not the fruit, isn't always the things.


But to see people saying like Tatum, I recommitted my life to Christ after hearing that prayer call, like I ha I took a break from the podcast and God brought you back to my mind or this, the show popped up what was recommended. Or I saw like, whatever the thing was, I saw it on Instagram. And so now I have new like, oh, I need to go and listen to this episode and boom, exactly what I've been praying and believing God for you already cut. So it is. So I see it all the time.


There are yeses attached to your obesity. And so you have to commit because that commitment is going to get somebody else to recommit to God, that commitment is going to allow you to build the thing, the business that's going to change. The world. That commitment is going to allow you to break those generational curses off your family, that commitment it's going to make your family want to know God because they see what God has done in your life. So to bring it full circle, y'all see by my Instagram posts, y'all see all the videos we do on YouTube and all of the things where I share with you guys, what God is doing in my life.


You see the results and the, the success. But I want you to understand that commitment. And I wanted to just take the story back to the beginning for a second, because I probably could have done more sooner. Had I truly built a relationship with God when I got saved, I shouldn't have had to get saved second. You know, I laugh about it because it's a funny term that I use, but I shouldn't have, who said that I had the time, time to go, to get saved, to say, I should have took care of this then.


And I didn't. And I'm grateful that God saw fit to give, to continue to give me options, opportunities. And that's part of the reason why I've been so committed and, and just always referring whenever God gives me a big assignment. Always referring back to that time in my closet where I told him I was going to truly live my life for him, because I know that I should have done that before. And he loved me enough to keep me to be able to get to that point.


And so again for you guys, I want you to commit, this is my second can appeal from last week. Last week I share what God wanted me to say. We got to praying, but this week is me petitioning you once again to truly commit recommit your life to God, right? Commit your life to God today, to the point where every decision that you make after today, I want you to go back to this moment where you said, you know what God and say this God, I surrender to you.


Forgive me Lord. For the times that I kept turning back, forgive me time. Forgive me God. For the times where I let the sin overtake my decision. Forgive me God, to where I was lukewarm and not truly seeking ye first, the kingdom of God. Forgive me for wanting all things to be added unto me before I sought you first, forgive me, asks for you to forgive me. I repent from sins knowingly and unknowingly committed on this day. God and father, I declare right now that it is me and you father, that I will not depart that I am here, father.


I want to know you want a deeper level. I want to build a relationship with you. Like never before. I want to hear you hear you. Like I've never heard you before. Lord God, father. I want you to help me tame my flesh, to continue to submit and surrender to you. So say whatever it is you need to say to God, be open, be vulnerable. This is where I was in that moment. I said, God, I'm not passionate about you. And that's why I've been playing around all these years. But God, I ask that if you just like the fire on the inside of me, I won't, I won't depart from you.


God. I promise you on this day in my closet, that I'm going to be in this with you, God. And that's what I did. That's what I said, because that was my truth. And so now with God just continues to, to grow me and stretch me and bless me and change me. And as those instructions, that things get bigger. I go back to that moment where I committed and are always say above all. I just want to be a person who does what she says she's going to do. It doesn't even have to be too deep. I just want to be a person of integrity.


And as a person of integrity, I am somebody who committed to God. And so I'm going to stick that out. And again, that doesn't mean I'm going to be perfect. That just means that when I fall, I'm going to get back up. When I seen him want to turn back, you can repent. Same for you. So again, I petition you. I just really want to just give you that big sister, push that little sister, push that cousin, friend, whatever you think of me. I just want to push you closer to God today.


So that's it. Thank you guys for listening to another episode of hope, me just recap in my story and just letting God use me over the last 30 minutes or so. Bless you. Make sure that you subscribe to the show, rate the show, follow us on Instagram at bless them, boss up. Follow me at Tatum to Mia. And I will talk to you guys next week.


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