You're listening to bless them. Bossed up with Tatum Temia. This is more than a podcast, but in online, safe space and community, where we teach purposeful women, how to be uncompromising about their faith, their business, and total life success with God as their CEO, get ready to be empowered and Bolden and given divine strategy to fulfill God's plan for your life and business. Let's start the show, work hard for what you wouldn't like
For what you want in life. Your word is your bond that you do. What you say you're going to do. Your work is your bond and you do. But you say that you treat people with dignity and respect that your reach of your dreams and your willingness to work hard of your dream and your willingness to go to for them. Hey guys, welcome to another episode
Of the blessed and boss podcast. I'm excited about this episode because we have an interview. We have back one of our favorite guests. You guys know her. I'm gonna do like I'm doing it on stage or something. You guys know where you guys love her. You seen her on a therapy as a Christian podcast. You see her on Instagram, giving you these reels with her beautiful baby and her husband. Okay. You've seen her out here. Snatching your schedule and your life. Getting you together.
You seen her out here getting your mental health in order, getting your time with God or I could keep going. Welcome back to the show. Ms. Roslyn, Renee. Woo. Insert all the flaps and the crowd goes wild. I'll keep thinking of the tick-tock PMP and P Rosalyn. Welcome back to the show. Hey girl. I was so excited to be here.
Thank you, girl. I love that little intro though. The people that we got to let people know. Okay. But the last time you were on the show, we talked so much. We talked about really just the theme of that conversation was more so about having a foundation of faith and how to spend time with God, how to grow your relationship with God. But at that time, I think when we originally recorded that you were in the girl.
Yeah. Yeah. I was pregnant. That was the height of the pandemic. You were pregnant. Did you? I don't know if you had announced at that point. No, I think I had just, I think I had, I don't even think I had no, no, no. I had found out because you had your baby in may. I think no Tatum. I don't think I probably the newer I had just found out. I don't remember at that time it was around that time. So a lot has changed.
Yeah. My baby was a whole six month old girl. He grown, he practically going, he was nine months clothes. I don't understand. But you know the thing, I guess bond is like that too. He's he's, he's always been just, just bigger. Like if it was 12 to eight, so right now he's in like 18 months and he's 13 months. He's always been like bigger child. What is it? But you'll feed him. Good. He over there have elegant cuisine. Okay.
Elegant cuisine. Everybody is like, when you bring that baby over here, bring his food with him. Cause we night we're not doing, I'll be over there. Probably speaking, springing oregano. And all of them are last Saul. You know what I'm saying? All organic. My mom, he ran out of milk one time and she was like, what? Send me a picture. Cause I don't have time. I'm like make sure it's a hundred percent grass fed organic. I send BJ to the store to get some yogurt or something. I said, BJ, this is not right.
Grass fed. He said, it's organic. Is that not enough? Like, no, that's not enough. I guess there's so dude, he was like, you know what? Next time go yourself is in the building for real. Yes. But a lot has changed for the both of us. Even with you transitioning, not necessarily transitioning, but growing and your business now preparing your, you know, in a process of preparing to be an entrepreneur full time, you know, have the podcast like child, you have a lot of amazing things going on.
And one thing that I admire about you is just your commitment and your willingness to adjust and transition. And not only just make these transitions, but make them keeping God at the forefront and making them well, you know, we talk on the show a lot about efficiency and processes and you're one of those is like with that we see each other, right? Like we're out of when it comes to that. So can you talk a bit about though your transition into motherhood, you're Trent, you prepare to transition with entrepreneurship and even what that has looked like as far as time management goes, as far as your faith goals go, first of all, the fact that you're saying out of your mouth, transitioning into full-time entrepreneur will show fire.
That confirms in my mind that God be hearing me. So let me backtrack and just give a quick Storytime. So this has star, this is like two years in the making of this full transition because I've been talking to God like so much about this, but that's a full Storytime God that would take over. That would be the whole podcast. So I want to just give encouragement to people to say like, whatever you do, stay out of your mouth to God goes to his ears. I don't care if it's years from now, he hears you and set you up.
So to give background, when I went into the pandemic pregnant, God really, really told me and showed me that this was going to be a different time because I had, because before I had my son, he told me to sit down and I basically got mad at him. Like, look, bruh, like, okay, this is not what I want. You know, I like to work like, you know, the baby girl, she likes to have a plan and procedure and like figure it out.
But I feel like their rest time was so vital because I give proxy, you take them because you really did spill all the lifting of girl motherhood is this. You can still go get the bag, but figure out how to take care of yourself first. And so I went into having, you know, Alijah very much so with the mindset, but I still have an identity outside of motherhood and I never wanted to become just a mom. Why? Because first of all, when I'm sitting idle, I'm thinking of 50 million things in general anyway.
And I think we can't get so caught up in pushing those things aside just because we have kids, the kids are going to be here regardless, but you still gotta be able to feel like yourself after having a child. And so I can say there, there, there were times where I felt like I didn't give myself enough grace to fully just be present as a mom. But also within that, I recognize that there was still more, there was our guy was always giving me the heart to do more. It wasn't a thing of, yes, I honor the fact that I had a baby and my baby was completely given to me out of faith.
But at the same time, there was still a pulling and a burden to do more for God's people. And I think that that was so heavy on me that I needed to have a lot of conversations with my husband about this is what this is. And he even kind of come in to tell me you got a lot going on. Let me take some of that. That, you know, those are some of the things that had to transition into going into this time where now the fruit of those seeds are actually bringing forth harvest. And so, you know, I, I think now, especially transitioning to motherhood, going into full-time entrepreneurship when that, when that happens, cause I'm saying that out of my mouth, it's just been a very much so now knowing and acting in faith, I think we as entrepreneurs or even just people that want to be entrepreneurs, we have this mindset of believing God, but knowing and acting in faith in what you really think and know you can do, you have everything you need.
There's too many resources out here for us to be just sitting on the things that we're, that we want to do. And that's what God had to ultimately show me. Like you gotta be able to be, to make decisions. You have to be able to do what you want to do and God giving you the freedom to do so. Yeah. So that's kind of where I landed with starting the things that I'm doing that ultimately will bring in the income that I know will sustain what I want to start. That's a good, you, I'm so glad that you talked about acting in faith because I believe that a lot of times acting in faith can feel unproductive and that's a season, it's a season I'm in right now that I'm really trying to, it's like I have to actively tame that solution's part of me.
And that's a hard part. Being somebody who is the type of person who gets things done, that type a personality. We don't have a problem doing the work. But when the work is to sit down, when the work is to submit to God's timing and his process, it's a direct conflict with what has made us successful in the other things that we've done. And it's such a frustrating place. Yes. When you're in kind of that season where God has you sitting down, it's frustrating. If I do believe that it accelerates us though, once God gives us that, go ahead, we can then apply that part of us to his plan.
It just makes us take off. But there is a real season of that space where acting in faith seems unproductive and I have to check myself and I, me and BJ were actually talking the other night. I'm like, man, I'm, I'm in a place where I have a lot of things that I pray for. You know, I, I wanted this family so bad and I had that. We wanted to buy a home. We did that. I wanted to have, you know, be a successful entrepreneur and have this company that does well. And I have that, but it's like, okay, now I want the next thing.
You know what I mean? Like I want the dream house. We bought the investment property. So we got the ownership, but I want the dream house. I want it. I want you to be out your job too. Want it? The dream would be to tell Nico, quit that like, that is a girl that is such a dream of him. I tell him that so much. And he's like five. I literally dream of saying to him, quit pollute. I cannot wait.
Like I cannot wait. And so it's like, I want you to quit your job as well. Like I want, I don't want just a six six-figure company. I want the million dollar company. I want all of these things. I want my employees to make six figures. So that's not enough that the company brings it in. I want to my staff to make that. And so it's this frustrating season. Cause I'm like, God, like I can figure this out and God is like, but really talk to your brakes, pump your brakes.
But yeah. So can you talk about though, just that frustration or how to act in faith when faith today, productive girl, I could talk about this and see, this is just further confirming. This season is edited off, but I'm like, I'm gonna cry. Okay. Let me stay focused. So I remember let him give me a, we can do it. Okay. So let me walk you back two years. So I currently eliminate my job.
I'm still in my job. About two years ago, 2018 was a real rough season. I had started the podcast now 2019, I had started the podcast. So I'm just starting this and I give props to Tatum and what she talks about y'all y'all I call her the pocket has godfather, but you don't really understand that when you really stay committed to planting the seeds for your podcast, your community will grow. That's probably the only reason and w and one of the, and I would say not the only reason, but also the commitment to staying faithful.
There is reward behind that. You don't see the fruits of those seeds until later. And so in 2019, I was, you know, I always have money-making thoughts in my mind all the time. I mean, I'd be like, oh, that's like, I tell Nico sometimes, like, I don't think I have a concept of money at times, because I'm like, oh, that's not that much. Oh, we can do that. Oh, we can invest and make this bag. Like, I'm always thinking of those things. And so my little, you know, brain of thinking that I could just go make the money.
I'm like, let me quit my job. Like, oh, I can quit. God. I could do it. If I got to drive, oh bro, if I gotta go, dude, you know, whatever, I'm going to quit. Why? Because I'm miserable doing what I'm doing every single day. And I remember it so vividly. I had got another job offer and I was set to quit and I was asking, God, okay, God wish jobs. Should I stay where I'm at? Or should I leave? And I had been fasting and praying fasting for, he would never give me an answer.
And I remember it was probably about a couple of days before I was supposed to give the answer or whether or not I was one to lead and put, like I put my resignation and everything. My boss at the time was like, please stay. It's like, please, I need you to stay. I need you to stay. And I was like, bro, I'm not to stay here. This is horrible. I'm miserable. This, this and this. And so, but all in my mind, I'm like, I know I'm an entrepreneur at even after eating, no matter how many jobs I take. I know at the end of the day, I don't want to work for nobody. And I remember going, driving down the street from my job and sitting in the car and I heard glass guy clears that.
He said, you can choose either job rise on it, but whatever you choose, the one, if you leave and go to another job, it's going to take you longer to learn the lesson. I need you to understand patience and long suffering. And I said, and I think about that since he said patients in law stuff. And I said, okay, well, I'm just going to be obedient and obey God. Okay, Lord. Why? Because I've been through so many seasons where I didn't know back then.
So I wasn't mature enough to understand, like it's better to obey now says, listen, it's not peaches and cream after you obey God, why these look like they're worse? And I've been in my job now for two years, but patiently, still planting. And that is hard. I mean, months of going home crying, like what, what, how long does the season last? How long do I have to stay? Why does everybody still see me like that?
Why am I able to like blurt out business ideas to other people? But here I am, you got me sitting and it doesn't feel good, but he's like, do what's in front of you do what your hands can touch, do what you have. And even there are times, like you said, where you have to tame it because the quickest thing is you can get up and go make a solution and it can make you money or it can do that. But is that, what does this satisfaction of feeling like, is this what God wants me to do?
Knowing I have what's in front of me that I need to do that I need to focus on. And so for the last two years is just been patiently planting and that does not look pretty. There are little moments where God will give you a little bit and you're like, okay, this is the thing. And he's like, oh Nope, Nope, Nope. Oh, Nope. And it's just being active. But all the while your character is building, your integrity is being mastered.
Your, your heart for people is being even more mastered. And I think that's the part we try to rush. But one thing God showed me while I was pregnant with Elijah is I want to bless you so that you're sustained. I don't want to bless you. So you squander because if you get what I w if you get what you're thinking you need, or you want, you're going to squander it and you're in it. And the other thing is probably within my lack of wisdom, I would probably put his name on it and that can lead people astray.
And that does not. And I truly believe that God would do things out of protection for us when we're ready to not put us in a place of lack of lack of wisdom. And so I've been like, I watched my parents, my parents were millionaires. I don't even know if I ever told you this story said my parents were millionaires and they squandered their blessing. And I've seen it firsthand. That is not a place to experience. God's wrath. Like you don't want to, like, you don't want to do that.
And so the ability to trust him, why he patiently plant is so important because the reward of knowing I waited and God gave what I got, gave it to me and it's not him. It's not me, it's him. And so I think that that's kind of what I'm experiencing now. And I'm more appreciative of it. That's good. I didn't realize until recently how contentment is such a warfare strategy. It is you're you being, content is a slap in the enemy's face to use your impatience and your inner hustler as I call it to get you outside of the will of God.
And that's something I learned recently. And then I have to continue to remind myself that me standing still, and me continuing to plant me, continuing to steward over the things that, that God has given me. It's a, it's a warfare tactic against the enemy. And it's also a form of praise to God because it's like, you know what, God, yeah, I do want the more I do want what's next.
And I know that those things are for me, but I'm going to honor you by just being content with where I am and contentment doesn't mean I'm not working towards the more it's just that I'm fine. I'm chill. I'm finding joy, which if you look up the concordance definition means awareness of God's grace. I'm being aware of the blessing and the grace that I have right now. And it is a piece to me that comes along with that. And with peace comes clarity.
That means that those ideas that I have are not driving me outside of the will of God. It means that that opportunity that I may want to hop on, that I know is not in this season. It just, it allows me to hear God clearer and to move on his timing on a day to day. And it sounds romantic in a sense to where it might sound like it's easy. It's not necessarily easy, but it's just making sure that I remain in the right position because we that's the responsibility that we have as people of faith in doing business.
God's way, it's not to just go ahead and make the money or hop into the thing and put his name on it. Like you said, it's really moving on his timing. And so that you can be responsible with what he's blessing you with. And most importantly, be responsible for responsible with the souls that he's assigned to you. There's so many man gotten off, you know what I'm saying? Who, whoever allowed people to put them on a pedestal. So now you're not hearing from God no more through them.
You're hearing from them. And I don't ever want to be in that position. Listen, I don't remember what book I was reading or listening to God. I can't remember what it was. No, it was a sermon. And this girl, it was Christine Kane. I remember. And she said, Joyce Meyer had told her once, you know, if she was on a stage and people were clapping for her. And she said, if you're looking for any response from the people, that's all you're going to get is a handclap. And so why live a life where the only response you get from people is a handclap.
That's not eternally satisfying. That's not an honor. That's just, that's eventually going to end. And so what I also have realized, and the other thing that I really want people to hone in on is that when you wait on God and you do it his way and you trust him, your desire is not on people's eyes. Your desire is truly on father. I wants to make impact that trans forms your people.
Why? Because your, your spirit is so amazing. People need to know what you can do in their lives, not just mine, it's you. And so if there's a touch point that you touch with people that don't have Jack to do with me, I don't know the impact I make in other people's lives on whatever I do. That's fine because that's not for me to know. That's that's for God to know. And if I worry myself so much on what I'm doing for other people, then again, I'm so obsessed over the handclap that I'm wasting time doing and being effective in the another way that God could want me to be effective.
And that's just not, it's a hard, it's a much, it's a place that requires maturity and you don't get that. I feel like until you've gone through multiple seasons of wasting time wanting a handclap. And I say that to say practically, like y'all, there've been seasons where I'm comparing, there's been seasons where I'm waiting on a handclap. There's been seasons of like seeing other people do it. And then you can come back to a place where God says, but why are you doing that for that? Why are you, why are you worrying yourself with that?
And he has to correct you. And then you realize, okay, that's how you pass the test. You get to the point where you say, okay, and then move to make the decision to something else. So, yeah, that's so good. That's so good. Good. Not doing it for the hand clap and not even doing it for the money or for the awards or for any like, that's important too. And it's not to say that you don't do things with the awareness that you should be compensated for your time business on all of that, but not doing it.
I think there's a place that we all have to get. You were just doing it because God says, so is enough girl. And I've been having conversations recently. We had this incentive with the retreat December that if people paid in full, then I'll do a one-on-one session with them prior to the retreat. And so I'm in any sessions and I'm listening to people and, you know, I go into with a mindset, okay. We about to build this podcast, but I always get slapped in the face of the results of decisions that I made, that I didn't see the result of that makes sense.
So let me reword it. So I'll be in conversations where people will be like, you know, I was listening, I was in the podcast app and your show just popped up, or God just led me to this podcast. And because of your podcasts, I started doing this and I ended up there and I'm like, I'm in this joint on mute, trying not to cry because it's like, this is years later, we've known his podcast for like four and a half years. This is, these are years later that I'm just now hearing the impact of my voice.
And it's not to say I didn't get indicators of the impact through analytics and all of that. But that stuff is one thing that's just numbers. That's just like, that's just stuff. But to hear that my obedience sparked somebody else's obedience that led them to like, that's what it's about. It's not about building a alter for ourselves. It's not about building a community that praises us. It's about just planting a seed that God then waters it.
Whether he uses Udall WaterAid whether he uses somebody yells to water it, whatever. But I mean, I had just been sitting in a, and I don't think that it's a coincidence that in this season where I'm really trying to keep that in our hustler at bay so that I can stay on track with God that he's allowed me to see this and to see the result and hear the stories of people's lives being changed as a result of the podcast, because it just goes to show that it's so much bigger than what we have when our vision, big facts, big facts.
And I say, I found your podcast through another entrepreneur, and I don't know how long you've been blessed in Boston, but had, I had been exposed to God as my CEO thought thought life, but never heard anybody talk about it. And it was almost like a something in me was like, there has to be a way to do business with God. And then like the connection point to verbalize it verbally and what that actually practically looks like. That is what you did.
And I think for impact, we have to know that God's spirit is everywhere. The enemy doesn't want impact. And so it isn't for our ears to look for our, or, or for us to look for the hand clap because the hand clap, isn't the, isn't the finished point. The finished point is God's spirit touching somebody and their life is transformed. That's something the enemy doesn't want, because if we are transformed to do what it is, where the spirit of God then could touch more people, baby, that's when his spirit is in the earth.
That's when he's able to actually do the miracles and things. It's not as though he can do it anyway, you can do it anyway. But the joy of it is knowing that I work. I work as a co-partner with the Lord and doing the work that he desires in such a way that's innovative. I'd be looking at some ideas. Sometimes even the recent program I just launched. And I'm thinking to myself, I've never seen anything like this. I don't even know how, how these things come together. The Lord does.
And so with that being said, the transformation is the fruit of that is all the things that the Bible talks about with the fruit of gentleness kindness. When somebody can go to God and say, God, I have an idea. I want to do this. And he backs it up with heaven behind you. It's like, that's, that's the baller type O G original gangster. Like you, ain't no gangster G Debbie ride in the Cadillac.
And they're supposed to be looking like you really built saying like, just when you got hit as army behind you. And, and to know like you could do that, it's just, there's just nothing who wouldn't want to start a guy like that. So I think that it's the pieces of knowing, like you said, the obedience, Matt, hers, and you will mess up, like, even I'll still be thinking you're mad, but I could be doing all these other things.
God I could be doing. You're not, not thinking that, but it's still an impactful thing. When, you know, man, I got somebody behind me, that's really backing me up what I love about God and that I think, let me just say, what I love about God is that he really transforms when they talk about the renewing of your mind. Like, you know, renewed them seem like a deep word, but God will really transform.
And I think a lot of like, if you look at just like mainstream things, I feel like God is spoken of as inspiration or the word of God is used to inspire. Know that things transforms. God will totally make you new and take ever, like, even thinking about saw to Paul, the man was persecuting. Like he was on a mission to get Christians up outta here.
And, and he had one encounter with Jesus and has, is one of the most transformational figures in the Bible with what God did through him wrote so much of the new tech, like the trend. I can't even put into words how God will transform you. And I want it to, to emphasize transformation because even with the work that you're doing in your new program, you're transforming people's mindset, you're transforming people's belief systems.
And, you know, we talked prior to this about just, you know, things like self-sabotage and procrastination. And I want you to speak about that and how faith and mental health and his transformation works together so that people can truly then be used by God to then go on and make the impact and things that we're talking about. So this is so like so much jam packed into this, but this is also my personal story, which is, I feel like partially why I couldn't even release this program until I walked through it because there were things I had to literally say, God, I have to give this up.
And once I get this up, I need you to back me up in this. So partially for those of you that don't know me, my background professionally is in mental health. I have a license in social work and also have worked clinically as a counselor for about five plus years. And I started doing coaching around time management last year during the pandemic. And it was really just out of a desire to help my friends.
And then it turned into a business, which let me just say, I asked God, what does this mean? And he just said, this will be a part of your business. Don't he don't give you really a structure. She was just, you just, you just don't get nothing. You just need to go what you got. So long story short. As I worked with clients, most of what I worked with them on, like sometimes people want ABCD 1, 2, 3, they want strategy. They want to, you know, they want the pretty boxed up. Here's what you need to do, but they don't want to work on the mindset.
And that's such a layered piece that before you you're even able to accomplish anything, you gotta deal with with the way you're thinking about it. Because if you don't, you could start a process stop and then tell yourself, oh, that's not for me. Maybe I don't need to do this. Oh, I can't do this. So this must be why. And you just talk so bad to yourself. And so a lot of the, the people that I would hear and it wasn't every single, it wasn't every single person, some people really needed just clarity, but a lot of what I found that, especially Christians and I say this.
So with love, like the narrative we tell ourselves is so negative and it's so wrapped in unbelief that, and again, I say this with love, this is partially why we're not doing the things we're called to do, because we just, we truly believe, like we don't believe in what we're actually saying. We believe. And a part of it is just the, the clarity of understanding that there are so many things that we've told ourselves for years.
People have said unknowingly, that we're constantly saying this negative narrative, that the inner, because here's the thing. The enemy can only provide a suggestion. And I say this in a very, like, I'm going to also give scripture behind this. But when, when the enemy came to eat, he only offers suggestion based on what she was told, which impacted her decision-making same thing. When he came to Jesus, he was telling him this, this, this to impact the way he thought about something to ultimately change the decision of what he, what he was supposed to do.
But the beautiful thing about our savior was that he knew it was so grounded in who he was, that he could come back and say, no, I'm not this, this, this, he didn't have the opportunity. So she actually then believed what she was told to then make a decision, which ultimately brought all these things. And so we accept these suggestions of I'm not good enough. God doesn't want this for me. It may not be my time, this business, th that person got it. So it must not be for me, I've heard things such as like, well, I can't do this because this person is, what did God tell you?
What desire do you have? And so there's this self-sabotage and really what that is, is this negative thought process that stops us from actually doing what we need to do. And then the procrastination piece is the behavior. Behaviorly we tell ourselves, oh, I do the best of my, I do the, my best work at the last minute. Or I'm just a procrastinator, which I'm not going to be, you know, real estate is Holly guys say that I ain't procrastinated before. But in saying that to say procrastinating on things, you know, you need to be doing to the point where, because you self sabotage and say, you don't, you don't have this, this, this, this, you push things off, you push things off, you push things off.
And then five years later, you're still in the same place. And so that goes into the way we actually get things done, which into our day, we, we, we tell us, well, this ain't going to be a good day or one thing happens and we just fall off the wagon completely. And that wagon could be weeks on end. And so you have to understand that with the power of God, the Bible talks about being renewed in your mind, but in the NLT version, it says, God transforms, God wants to transform the way you think.
Why? Because if he can transform the way you think to be gentle to somebody, you will then act in gentleness. You will then act in belief. I say this other thing too, you can't un-see possibility when something actually happens and you see it be done like Tatum, you can't unsee God allowing you to make six figures in your business. You can't unsee that you can't unsee to say that that's not possible. And so, because of that, we tell ourselves it's not for as God doesn't want it for us.
So then what happens? We don't do it. We don't act on it. We start to unbelieve and then don't make the steps to do it. And that's what I really want people to understand. Like, this is a basic concept when it goes to it to your day, your destiny, but also even in just you being able to be effective in doing things for your family, being effective and doing things for your life, being effective in doing your day to day things, which ultimately is that act of faith. Love it. I love it. Even the definition of faith is confidence in things hope for assurance about things unseen and keeping that definition in mind.
I believe one of the reasons faith was so clearly defined and Hebrews 11 and one, and backed up by examples. Cause if you go to Hebrews 11, he gives all the examples of people in the Bible who did things in faith, how he told Abraham to get up and go, and I'll tell you where to go. Like what you mean? Like, where am I going? When he told Abraham to go sacrifice, that's such a beautiful example of God. Don't give, you know, extra instructions, but just here, just in, in again, I think he gave the definition because whenever we try to get a lot of times, we try to use or say, we're looking for clarity when it's not clarity.
Isn't what you need. Faith is what you need. You need to act, even though you don't have the clarity, you get up and go, even though you don't know where you're going. Wow. Documented what that, what the result of that is. That's why we have the blueprint. That's why we have the Bible. It's documented what happens when you obey God, if you go to Deuteronomy 28, the list of the blessings for your obedience is right there. And so I I'm so glad that you, that you touched on that because a lot of us, we need a failure refresher.
Yeah. And truly to, and to even go with faith, to switch that, to go to what are the things that impact our faith like, or, or, or make us question. Like I talked about this on the free class. I did that. I'm going to tell you all about like, self-sabotage has so many correlations with so many things. It goes with fear, failure, perfectionism, lack of self-worth unresolved trauma. When you, when you feel like when you have, when you have gone through something and you just generalize everything in your life to that, there's no feeling of faith, putting yourself down, feeling like you got to have instant gratification.
So, so because you see somebody else at their Y Z, because you're at C, D oh, it's not for me because you want the tomorrow. And really, you gotta get to element RP or, and really just honestly, even to, self-blame like, you blame yourself when you've made mistakes. And so, and so, like you said, with the faith refresher, God, his hand is on all of those things, but we don't have the, we, we, we make the decision to give it to God.
But then truly being, when we give it to him, we try to pick it back up and then don't act and what we're supposed to do. Yeah. That's it. I talked last week about, I think the episode was called, like rewire your mind or something like that. But I'm reading this book, it's called the whole brain child. So I'm reading it because toddler life, and I need to figure out what's happening in that little brain of his, but I'm reading it though. And it, and it was talking about how, as they are studying the brain, they realized that they thought at one point scientists thought that the brain stopped growing at a certain point.
But in their research, they realized that the brain actually never S like even up into our big old ages and beyond the brain is constantly changing and developing and molding it. And what's causing it to change is experience. And so even thinking from the so good point is you want to get to a place where you're overcoming self sabotage, and you're changing your mind about the procrastination, about the limited beliefs, about all of these things. You have to give yourself experiences that gives you the growth mindset, the preparedness, the order that you desire, what that looks like.
It's going to take a little bit of figuring it out. You know what I'm saying? Or if you're somebody who has limited belief systems, put yourself in situations where you're are, where you're now training your mind, or putting yourself in experiences that you can't unseat. So you're saying like, I can't unsee myself living in, you know, not making six figures, but even with what I want to do next, I, I remember one time, me and BJ, we went out and we both are subscribed because our dream house, my dream house is in Potomac. Like, I want me to come over a half hour.
I won't be on the road, but no, they ain't gonna do me like that. But, but that's the area, you know, Montgomery county is one of the best school systems. And in the country, you know, it's a beautiful area. Just loved the area over there. So one time, and so we're subscribed to like, all the houses that'd be on sale. So then we begin mad when people would be buying a house. Right. So we went, once I went out to eat and he was like, let's go drive by one of the houses. So we picked one and I'm like, look, let's say a prayer, because we wanted these white neighborhoods.
We try to call nine 11. I'm like behind it's out here. Right. So, so we wrote in his neighborhood and I remember thinking like, as we were looking, man, I could see myself living here, like, look at the six car garage. I could see that, oh, I could see having my grandmother, you know, living in, in the back house to where she's still living with us. And she has her own space, just small things like that is trained in my mind to where it's possible.
And if somebody else can live that life, I know I can. If I got the Lord of hosts, like heaven backing me up, oh, please. Let's just about her a top. But just putting yourself like doing things like that gives you that experience. It may not be firsthand. Maybe you go rent you an Airbnb. That's, you know, huge. And you stay for a night, but it's just that experience is rewiring your brain to know that it's possible fam fam.
And I tell the girl, and I really am. I know I'm talking about this from a business standpoint. Now I remember last year when I was, I was scared to do a class for $97. And when that one person paid the $97, I
Was like, oh my God.
Yeah. Somebody paid $97. When somebody paid four figures or something that got an idea, God gave me and put out. And I was confident in the value. I told myself, I said, I can't unseat paycheck, somebody. And I say that humbly y'all, but I'm saying that to say like, they used to be a, a faith thought of, oh, somebody will do that.
And when it happens, it's almost as if, like you said, I was over here, worry for nothing. I was over here thinking it wouldn't happen for nothing. Even if, even if it didn't happen, let me go back to the drawing board and make what I'm doing better so that it can happen. Let me, let me figure out what are the gaps? What are the things I'm missing? What are the things I need to continue to work on? So that when, cause you're going to fail, like you're going to fail it. So many things, but the failure is not really, it's not even failure.
It's really, you're going to learn lessons, reframe it. And so again, you can't unsee that. And so with the faith, the faith moves, y'all listen to what you hear. Tighten them. Say every week, like she's walked the walk of God's saying, hold on, God's saying, don't move. God's saying this is that like, thinking about when the spies went to have to go peep out the promised land and they had, and they came back and said, is it his phone with no, can honey, it's there.
Like, we think it's not possible. God wouldn't honor the promise. Like he's not a liar. He's not just because it doesn't come in our timing. And so you gotta know like it's very possible. Even if there's a tie there, the vision comes at an appointed time. Yeah. So, but what do you have to do right now to work on getting to that place? What, what ha what hard things you need to dig through? What things has God revealed to you and correct you on that. You still are having problems with actively do those things, because he's not bringing them up for no purpose.
He's bringing them up because he knows what's ahead. And if you don't deal with that, it's going to be a Steiff. It's going to be a stumbling block to continue to continue the vision. Because, because yeah, you know, you can see people there say they're walking in obedience and the things that are ha, but you also don't recognize that the problems that are on C and D are so different from element LP, like they're a different, there's a different set of things you have, like me thinking about now, hiring somebody like that thought process is like, I'm going to pay somebody money to do something because I don't have the time on my plate to do it.
That's a different problem than when Roslyn was just recording a podcast once a week. Yeah. Way different layered. But there's a different type of mindset you have to get to in order to get to that point, you got to go through the first part. Yeah. And the problems are different, but the faith is the consistent thing. Same, same faith that worked for you to charge $97. The faith that was applied to charging over a thousand dollars, the faith is the common denominator.
So whatever the situation is, the faith is like, I think about even the tour, I had never did a lot of it before, because I was scared. Like, what if nobody shows up, I'm like, who's going to come and pay money to spend times out their day to come to an event that I had. Like, I was so fearful of doing a live event. That up until that point, I hadn't done one. And then God says to go on a four city tour. And then we did two retreats that year. So to be scared, to not do an event, to have six of them in one year was my, like, I didn't know what was going on, but that faith, I, that, and I remember even being in Dallas, which was the first stop at the end of it, I broke down.
Like I had posted a picture. I was just bawling. And BJ just had his hand on my head and was just praying over me. But I was bawling because I couldn't believe that we did it. Like God, it was like the, you know, talk about confidence, the things on scene, when you finally see it's like, it's this, you can't, you will never be able to unsee it again. And that was a mindset shift for me to where it's now it's less about, because I think up until that point, I had faith. Faith was more of a burden.
If that made sense. Like not that it is a heavy, it felt heavy. And it felt it was, it was just a lot. I don't even know the word for it, but it definitely felt heavy. But after that wrote that, that faith experience. Now I look at faith as an opportunity for that moment to happen again, because in that moment, it wasn't, it was just like, it was like, whoa, not only did we get here and we do it in the room is packed, but I'm looking at the people on their face at the altar is the transformation and the impact.
I'm looking at the guy who works at the hotel, who was doing audio at the alter. I'm looking at the photographer who, I don't know from Adam. We just found dude to take some pictures after the alter. Like at that moment, I think that was one of the pivotal moments in my re my confidence in God and what he would do if I was to just take the steps, if I was to just get up and go. And so now when we're applying the same faith to the next step, I look at it as an opportunity to now further brag on God.
And I think that's a mindset shift that is very necessary for us as people of faith going about life and business is to look at these challenges as an opportunity to testify. And I told him last week, even looking at my grandmother being almost 80 years old, stage four cancer, they say home girl, they say, listen, this is the most rare form of thyroid cancer. People don't live three months. We're past three months, no oxygen, no Walker can very well do everything by herself.
If she wanted to, they're looking at her chart and looking at her in person and saying, these are not the same people, but this is a message. This is what God does. This is a miracle. So now every challenge is just an opportunity for, for us to brag on the ways of God in the mysteries of him. And those are the opportunities that win more souls that bring people to Christ. So I want you to talk about though, as you started to work with these clients and address this procrastination, these self-sabotaging behaviors, and really check it and check that mindset.
What happened,
Speaker 3 (49m 59s): Girl? Just for one, I
Speaker 2 (50m 2s): Think possibility, like going back to, I can't unseat this, I think a lot of the things clients saw was this is really actually possible for me to do, but because there hadn't been any strategy we had. And a lot of times too, when it comes to strategy, like a lot of things I've learned is people haven't been taught this and might be common knowledge to me may not be common knowledge to other people. And I say that also, let me add a little tidbit.
Like, this is why, whoever, and whatever you do in desire to do go do it because I'm not knowledgeable, fully and strategy towards podcasts, Tatum, Tatum, not knowledgeable and strict as you related to mental health. I am those different burdens that I feel or what may feel like. And I say burdens, meaning like the things that are like, oh, people I wish they would get this kind of thing. Aren't aren't are things other people may have.
And so what I saw was just the uncovering of what God does is what he, he uncovers people can know, oh, I still sabotage, but they don't know why. Yeah. And when you can understand why the enemy attacks me in this way, you have more understanding of your, of when he calls to bring suggestion that something's not true. Same reason as to, again, I go back to Jesus. When he came to him, after he fasted, he said, this is, this is, this is this.
And Jesus came back and said, no, this is this because he understood you're coming at me with this lens, but this is the word of God and this lands. And so I think when people are able to understand I'm procrastinating or I'm procrastinating, because I'm really trying to avoid the pain of really actually doing or I'm procrastinating because I, another was a client. I was helping once where she said she procrastinates because she actually feels like she's not, she doesn't really want to see it through, because if she actually sees it through, that means there's going to be more work than she has to do.
She's like, I just don't want to do the work Roslyn now. I'm like, but why, why is there a lack of, of wanting to see it through in this area? Sometimes clients just really came with feeling as though I have to make a decision and I don't want to make the decision. So I just procrastinate why though. And so when they're able to understand that it's really about, I got to take another step in believing in myself. I gotta take another step and actually following through to do it, they were more able to then do the thing.
And on the other side of it, they saw it was possible. I was even like sent a voicemail to a client yesterday. And I checked in with her. She was like, Roslyn, I've just been able to adjust better. Like a mom who has shutting her baby was only five months old, has a, five-year-old married, managing 50 million things that she was just like, I wasn't adjusting. I'm able to adjust. Now that's a transformation for a wife and a mom, because when you have a new baby, you have been the main things going on. You're just going by what's happening. But how can mom say it's actually possible for me to stop in this moment, adjust my mentality and say, okay.
And biggest thing we worked on with her is how can you manage one or two things in the moment? Yeah. Not feeling like you're overwhelmed with the baby, the other baby, the husband, your schoolwork, all this kind of stuff. What can you manage right there for you? And that was enough. That's good. That's good. So we talked a lot about, you know, your clients and then seeing those transplants, tell us about the program because I feel like, okay, girl, but I'm trying to stop so toxic. So what's up.
Okay. So let me get back of show upstairs. So I'm using an information. Why? Because I truly believe that when you hear positive messages, it really, really, really impacts the way you think. So I think that on my phone that there's, first of all, the shortcuts app, if you don't have iPhone, it's like the bomb. And so I found some video on Instagram one day, that was like, I was, it was when I was, when I think Elijah was on like three months old. And it basically said, you plugged in your phone and Siri will tell you to tell you something.
So I was like, I want to see her to give me an affirmation when I plug her in and tell me to show up SIS. Cause you know, I say this all the time and it ended up becoming like a mantra of sheriffs. They show up and I say, you know, Lord, is there a domain for this? You see like the business brain child, and it was available. And I said, oh, I love you baby girl. So I'm blessed. You don't let the, let them die. Maybe available for 1199 guy, look at you.
So I bought the domain and I was like, no, I'm gonna do something with this. But they literally kept coming to my Browns. Like this may be the thing. And I had been saying, I wanted to do a group coaching program for a while. I was just like, I don't know. I don't know, going back and forth on it. And so show ups, this is basically taking all of my understanding, mental health wise and taking all the things I deal with time management, coaching and piecing them together.
And the idea is I really want to help ambitious women of faith learn how to overcome self-sabotage and procrastination. Because one of those, those two pieces really help you then to see that you can actively create routines at work, that you can start doing the things that help you become more productive, disciplined, and fulfilled. Those were the three areas where when you're disciplined, you can do the things every day. Even though you don't want to. When you know you got to get it done, you're more productive because you're efficient.
You can see that efficiency is important. It's important. Not this, like I'm just doing things to just be doing them. A lot of clients saw that I could actually get a lot done in my week. I ain't never been productive before. I haven't heard that because there is not a lot of deep work. Now there's just a lot of doing, we're getting distracted doing, we're getting distracted, but like, how can you really be productive? And then overall fulfillment of how I, how can, like, I think you told me this ones where you step away and you can say, what I did today was good.
Yeah. Like overall feeling fulfilled in your heart to know I'm accomplishing a lot. And so in the program, I teach you all of those things. We go through everything. As it relates to your time management, self sabotage, we talk about what it looks like for you to be productive. We talk about what's on your plate. We talk about your value system. We talk about rest because that's a girl, that's a huge thing. We talk about your schedule. We talk about how you can have desire goals. If you have a business that you want to start, but you don't know how to fit it into your schedule.
Like we talk about that. We talk about self-care. We talk about how you can really, really begin to see things and do things differently where you can have an effective week and it's not overwhelming to you mentally, everybody that a lot of the clients come to me said, they're overwhelmed. I'm tired of scatterbrained. You just really need efficiency. That's really, and you need to be able to know how to, how to schedule your week and your day out. But there's more to
Speaker 4 (57m 32s): It than just, you want to be able to have some of the desires you
Speaker 2 (57m 34s): Desire. And so really, I just want to teach people how they can start being able to be productive. So, yeah, so that's what the program is. I want to pour into them. We're doing eight weeks of live coaching. They do Q and a calls. They get access to the replays. It's just gonna be a phenomenal program. If you are ready, I'm only taking 10. I only have six more slots left six, am I doing it? Right?
7, 7, 5, 7 slots lifts. So you have to sign up before then. And I know those things are going to be full. So yes, I'm excited for you Roslyn. I mean, it's been like such a joy for me meeting you. Like what two years ago? Well, years ago, and working on the podcast and then seeing you do the time with God challenges and then the time management coaching and having a baby and now experiencing those transitions for yourself and the emotions behind, like, we joke about the feelings part, but there are a lot of feelings involved.
Like I joke all the time, but it's been many a times where I've been like, balling like, God, what is going on with this transition? Why does it seem like I'm taking, I'm starting from behind by doing things you're wet, those emotions behind it are so, so, so important. And those deep rooted things that impact the way that we way that we do things and why we are the way we are matters. And so just to see you navigate your own therapy journey and your own business journey, and they'll transition in, like I said to motherhood and what that means, like it's been such an honor to cheer you on, to be a listening ear for you as you offer me.
And just to see just how God is just really growing you and expanding your territory. I just had to say publicly, like, I'm just so proud of you and I'm so excited for what you're doing next. And you know, I'm always down for whatever to help push whatever it is that you have going on. So I just want to give you your flowers straight. You plow was this okay? We're going to go there cause you going to be like, oh, stop. Okay. Okay. You know, I'm like, all right, well, that's it.
like, you know what I'm saying? Do hydraulics and the Cadillac shout out to Memphis. Well, I love you SIS. Thank you. And thank you so much for always supporting, you know, listen it's thank you for what you do. And in sharing the story, because us that are really side hustlers that are going to be full-time entrepreneurs, myself included very soon to have a voice that's that's articulating what we need in going into those seasons if necessary and doing it with God, because there ain't many voices out here like that as many voices putting God's name on a lot of stuff, but not really walking it out.
And so that is so needed. And I appreciate you. Thank you, girl. We'll let people know like where to find you all that good stuff. Yes. So you can find me really just on Instagram child. That's the only platform I'm most proud to be on because I don't have time or space to do anything else. Follow me on Instagram at rather than that's pretty much where I'm at. Mostly please sign in my DMS girl. If you ever like listen to this and the impact of you, I just love talking to y'all the DMS, but that's it Roslyn and ROS.
L Y N R E N E. And yeah. Show up. So the therapy as a Christian podcast network, yes. Listened to the podcast therapy as a Christian and my baby, my baby, my baby. They'd probably be like, girl, girl, I'm doing too many things, but yeah. Therapy is a Christian podcast on all platforms.
Go get you some tea, girl bins, the podcast. It's really good. Go get your life. I love y'all guys. All right. Well thank you. Rozman for being here. Thank you guys for listening to another episode of the blessing boss podcast. And I will talk to you next week.